Table Talk

Hi everyone!

It’s Mommy Monday!

We’ve always had a tradition in our home… we eat dinner together… as a family… at the table. That tradition started when my husband and I got married. In the beginning of our marriage, we both worked the afternoon shift and had the same schedule, so we always made it a point to have family time at the dinner table on our days off.

It was a great way to “catch up” and “keep up” with what was going on in their lives- and in their heads. It was also one of the few opportunities to corral all five kids together in the same room… at the same time… and without any arguments.

We continued this tradition when the twins came to live with us. This was a totally new concept for them, but it quickly became the one time of the day that they actually seemed to look forward to.

Needless to say, we’ve had some pretty interesting conversations with our first generation of kids over the years… like the time when our oldest son (I think he was about 14 at the time) informed us that he wouldn’t need to get a job when he grew up- because he wouldn’t have the need for money. He was going to be self-sufficient, living off the land… in an underground cave that he was going to “build”! Looking back, I kinda wish he would’ve followed through with that plan.

It was also at the dinner table that we were able to find out who was responsible for leading the pack when they all decided to climb out of an upper story bedroom window so they could take turns jumping off the roof!

But, NONE of those conversations could have ever prepared me for the conversations from this next generation!

One evening while my husband was at work, the boys decided to throw this one at me…

Jeff: Grandma?
Me: Yes, Jeff?
Jeff: Do you HAVE to be married to have a baby?
Me: (I was NOT expecting THAT subject to come up!) Ummmm… why would you ask that?
Jeff: Because someone from school said that people can have babies without getting married.
Me: Well… you SHOULD be married before you have a baby. (HOPEFULLY this will pacify him…)
Jeff: Oh… so my mom and dad were married when we were born?
Me: (Uh oh!) Well… ummmm… no. They were living together when you were born, but they weren’t married.
Jeff: That doesn’t make any sense! Then how did my mom have a baby?
Me: (NOW what do I say?!?) Well… sometimes when two people are in love and living together, they have a baby.
Jeff: Oh… (Whew! I THOUGHT it was finally the end of the conversation… but NOPE! Now his BROTHER decides to join in…)
James: Well… I heard that anyone can have a baby just by HUMPING!

REALLY?!? HUMPING?!? He’s TEN!!! Ugh!!!

And then there was the time when my son and his fiancée came to dinner one night…

Jeff: Uncle Jared, do you get to keep your apartment forever or are you just paying rent for it?
Jared: I’m just renting it, why?
Jeff: I was just wondering if you got to keep it… you know… like a condom or something.

I know at least TWO of us nearly choked on our food! But then there was more…

Jeff: Uncle Jared… don’t forget you said that when I turn 21, you’re going to take me somewhere FUN… you know… a B-A-R (because apparently grandma doesn’t know how to spell?!?)!
Jared: I don’t know what you’re talking about (as he shoots me a shifty-eyed glance!)… I never said that (because apparently I’m also BLIND, as well!).
Me: Don’t worry- I won’t be around here when Jeff turns 21…
Jeff: Where WILL you be, grandma?
Me: Somewhere WARM AND SUNNY!!!
Jeff: Oh, I know where that is!
Me: You do, huh? Where do you think it is?
Jeff: HEAVEN!!!

You know, he could be right… at this rate I may die laughing!

Family time… it’s what’s for dinner 😉

Enjoy…

Lynn

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